Archive for the ‘Absurdisms’ category

Tea Party Jesus

April 10, 2010

Check out Tea Party Jesus, a web page that puts the words of Christians into the mouth of Jesus. When you click on the picture it will bring you to the conservative Christian being quoted.

Awkward Moment

April 2, 2010

Spartacus “Curse” Claims Another

January 26, 2010

The curse attached to the classic film Spartacus has taken another: actress Jean Simmons has died at age 81. Since the film’s original release in 1960, the curse has taken* many great talents from us:

Charles Laughton, died 1962
Dalton Trumbo, died 1976
Laurence Olivier, died 1989
John Ireland, died 1992
Kirk Douglas, stroke 1996
Stanley Kubrick, died 1999
Howard Fast, died 2003
Peter Ustinov, died 2004
Jean Simmons, died 2010

And now the fates are being tempted again with a new Spartacus television series. The curse appears to have already taken effect since it will be broad cast on the Starz network.

*As the curse on King Tut’s tomb has shown us, there is no time limit on curses, and decades may pass from one death to another. Howard Carter, the lead archeologist on the dig, died 17 years after the tomb was opened and his death is frequently cited as being caused by the curse.

2 Kings 2:23-24, For Real

December 28, 2009

Too funny not to post (2 Kings 2:23-24)

Jesus Christ Kicked Off Jury

December 2, 2009

Story from AP:

Court officials say a Birmingham woman who changed her name to Jesus Christ didn’t live up to it when she reported for jury duty this week. The woman, previously named Dorothy Lola Killingworth, was sent to Judge Clyde Jones’s courtroom for a criminal case Monday.

Court officials told The Birmingham News Tuesday that the 59-year-old was excused because she was disruptive and kept asking questions instead of answering them.

Efforts to reach Christ for comment were unsuccessful.

“Effort to reach Christ were unsuccessful.” Isn’t that always the case?

2012?

November 22, 2009

Baby Einstein … not so much

October 23, 2009

According to this article:

the Walt Disney Company is now offering refunds for all those “Baby Einstein” videos that did not make children into geniuses.

They may have been a great electronic baby sitter, but the unusual refunds appear to be a tacit admission that they did not increase infant intellect.

So, it turns out that turning on a box and walking out of the room does nothing to increase your child’s intellect. That’s crazy. Next thing you’ll tell me is that Einstein himself didn’t just passively sit in from of a TV to get so smart. What is a parent to do. I’m starting to have my doubt that splashing water on a baby’s forehead will make them magically a good person.